My Naughty Thoughts : So Much Sex

Wow! Can a book have too much sex? Yes...um...No...hum...Is there even such a thing as too much sex? In my post Is it the Sex or the Story I said that I didn't read romance novels for the sex (scout's honour). Well, I just stepped out of that zone. I admitted in my last post Fifty Shades of WTF that I finally read a romance novel purely for the sex. My curiosity got the better of me. I'd heard the hype surrounding Fifty Shades of Grey, my cousin was reading it (and she never reads) so I thought, what the hell.

Boy was I blown away, and that I think is an understatement. I've never read an erotica before, my romance genre being historical, regency and paranormal, so I really have nothing to compare my experience to. Do all eroticas have this much sex? It wasn't graphic in the least, thankfully, but every other page had a sex scene. Anastasia and Christian did it every day, sometimes four times a day, every which way. Who has the time for all that? I was tired just reading about it, didn't they get tired doing it? Jeez.... I mean

Those two did it here and there, those two did it everywhere.
Yes they did it on a bar, they even did it in a car.
They didn't do it on a train, but they did it on a plane.
They went out sailing on The Grace, and on the sea they did embrace.
You'd think by now their ardour would douse, but alas, they did it in his parent's boathouse. 

The elevator ride, need I say more, definitely deserves another, encore.
He has no pool up in his tower, so they steamed up his grand shower.
On the bed, the wall, the door, they even did it on the floor.
He really really tried his best, and got her flat on his desk.

You want to know where else you say, they did it in his room of play.
There he tied her up with cable, and they did it on a table.
Speaking of being tied up, he used leather, rope, chains and cuffs.
Lordy lord the things they've done, would make an innocent maiden run.
For she lets him do real naughty things, why not when she got the ring.

Do I now feel like I've OD'ed on sex (the reading part - wink)? Hum...honestly, I got bored reading it. It was a little too much for me. The rest of the story was great. I enjoyed the emotional ups and downs. But OMG enough already....so I guess for me...a book can have too much sex.

And that's my naughty thoughts on sex, sex, and more sex in romance novels.

Later Loveys

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My Naughty Thoughts : Fifty Shades of WTF

A few days ago I locked myself out of my apartment and of course as luck would have it, that day my landlords were out and my cell was dead. For two and a half hours I sat outside my door on the cold, hard concrete and waited for my landlords to return and relieve me from my self inflicted hell. Let me just say that days later my ass still hurts.

Anyway, though I'm in the habit of carrying my tablet, I am not in the habit of leaving my WiFi on. So there I was, stuck outside with no cell phone and no internet to pass the time. Then I remembered, I have one book on my tablet that I haven't read yet. It's been there for weeks and I've been debating whether or not I really want to read it.

So now I had two choices, I could stare at the slowly darkening sky, or I could read the book. (Oh I don't socialize with my neighbours). So I fired up my tablet and opened my reader and a grey cover with a silk tie flashes across my screen. The title Fifty Shades of Grey captures my attention and I dive in.

Yes its been a few years since the book came out and I'm only now reading it. (I didn't start reading the Twilight series til after I watched the first movie). Let me be honest, I'm reading it for the sex. Pure and simple, no other reason. I've wondered for a while what all the hoopla was about. I actually thought it would be a little more graphic, or maybe I just haven't gotten there yet. I am only on chapter twenty-four. But I must say, I can't remember the last time I read a book with so much sex.

The weirdest thing I find about reading this book is how it uncovered a part of me that I didn't know existed. I am an extremely dominating person, type A personality. Christian ain't got nothing on me. Everything is always my way or no way. And I'm quick to anger when I don't get my way. I couldn't be submissive even if you paid me. Yet I find myself gravitating more towards the Anastasia role. I'm a little like her where I tend to over-think everything and it gets so tiring sometimes, my mind always running. Thinking about outcomes and perception. The idea of simplifying something in my life by giving over control to someone else has some appeal.

So I said I started this book for the sex, and now I've shifted gears.  I've become wrapped up in Christian's psychological problems. Now all I want to know is why doesn't he like to be touched? What's his hang up about food? And did his birth mother or Mrs Robinson make him "crazy"? I love a male lead with problems. It always gives him so much more depth than a Mr. Perfect. The Christian character has got me more hooked than the sex.

I've already cheated and read pages from book three because I had to know if Christian and Anastasia make it to the end. I'm exerting massive amounts of control not to read the last few pages of book one. I'm dying to know what happens already. (That's a nasty habit of mine, reading the end of books before I even start it).

Anyway, so on I read, 50 pages left.

And that's my naughty thoughts on fifty shades.

Later Loveys

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Sample Review

I'm looking for a few readers to critique the first two chapters of my paranormal romance novel. I'm open to honest and constructive reviews. If you're interested, send me an email at illyannafox@gmail.com and I'll email you the sample.

For 2014

So I've been offline for a while. Been dealing with some personal shit that has consumed my life. It's put me in a place so dark that not even my writing pulls me from it. I didn't want to infect my writing with my darkness, so I put it to the side. Although I'm still in that place, I think I'm ready to write again. So I'll talk to you'll later.

'Schooled' by Michelle Lowhorn Book Blitz

Schooled

The Teacher Series Book # 1

By- Michelle Lowhorn

Genre- Romantic Suspense

Publication Date- October 16, 2013

Published By- Rebel Ink Press

Feisty fourth grade teacher, Emmelynne Johnson, is fiercely independent and has a vocabulary that would make a sailor blush. While hiking at an area national park, she finds herself lost and alone. Just when she thinks she’s found her way, she unknowingly witnesses a brutal murder sanctioned by a local crime boss.

Colt Christianson, homicide detective for the Fort Worth Police Department, is known for his dedication and willingness to do whatever necessary to solve the crime. Still grieving for his late partner, Colt is called to investigate a murder that has connections to his partner’s death.

When the killers attempt to silence the only witness, the detective switches roles to become her protector. Together they will be forced to fight two battles, one against the killers and one against their burgeoning mutual attraction.

My Naughty Thoughts : She Puts the B in *itch

Villains come in all shapes, sizes and yes, even sexes. They're either a combatant to the hero's strength, or a threat to the heroine's safety, and many times they're usually of the male persuasion. But there is one type of villain that I think is underused in romance novels. You know her, she puts the B in *itch and we love to hate her for it. Her role is sometimes as a competitor for the hero's affections or a simple thorn in the heroine's side.

I remember the first romance novel I ever bought had just such a bitch. I enjoyed hating on her. She was all over the hero every opportunity she got and rude to the heroine, who was his wife. Why did I get so mad at her? Because she played on something I hate...people who don't respect other people's relationship. I was cackling with glee when the heroine finally grabbed her by the hair and tossed her out of her husband's bed chamber (it was a historical by the way). Not only is this one of my favourite books but that's one of my favourite and most memorable scenes.

I love a good female protagonist. I love when for two seconds she makes me forget it's just a book, and I get so angry at her antics that I'm cursing under my breath. My perfect example, even though she's not a romance novel character, is Kathrine Kelly Lang on B&B. I hate her character with such a passion that I had to stop watching that soap opera years ago. I was always afraid I'd throw my remote at the TV. (I'm sure people like Brooke, but hey, villainy is in the eye of the beholder). To make a viewer, or reader, have an emotional reaction to someone that's not even real, I think is great writing.

Now I may sound like I only like a female villain if she's going after the hero romantically. Not so. A villainess who's out for blood is just as anger inducing. But sometimes, the interesting few, are just fun to read about. Like the Evil Queen from Once Upon A Time. I love the Regina character. I love her Evil Queen wardrobe (vanity part of me speaking), love her little quips (I'm always laughing at her witty insults - "Go walk yourself" to Red Riding Hood), and honestly I keep routing for her to come out on top (is that bad?).

And then there's the single white female. The crazy that give you the chills and make you say "what the f's wrong with this psycho bitch?" Her brand of villainy is down right scary.

So however she comes, whatever BS she pulls, whether she's a stalker, a vengeful viper or a crazy b-otch, she will leave an indelible mark on you.

And that's my naughty thoughts on bitches we love to hate on.

Later Loveys

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Supernatural Six Blog Tour - Win $50

Today kicks off an amazing week of snippets and meme's for Supernatural Six, and your chance to win $50 for helping us spread the word on this great deal.

Secret powers, genies, mermaids, angels, vampires and demons. There’s something for every paranormal enthusiast. Supernatural Six brings you six novels from six authors who know how to raise the stakes and tame the darkness.

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Duality by Elle Casey (New York Times Bestselling Author) - Malcolm's had a problem for as long as he can remember. No matter where he goes or what he does, he leaves misery in his wake. But then Rae shows up in his life, and everything changes. Darkness cleaves to light. Anger yields to joy. The question is whether she'll be his salvation or his destruction.

Three Wishes by Juli Alexander - Not every seventeen-year-old girl works part time granting wishes, but when you’re a genie, you have obligations. Jen finally gets a shot as a drummer in her brother’s band.  Just when it’s looking good for her, Leo Fuller shows up, and this bad boy genie’ s after more than just her drummer gig.

Atlantis Riptide by Allie Burton - Teen runaway Pearl craves anonymity, but when she saves a toddler from drowning she draws attention to her special water skills. Unknown to her, a war rages under the ocean and each side wants to use her powers for their cause. Pearl must choose her own destiny—ignore the churning seas or swim into battle.

Lash by L.G. Castillo - Banished angel Lash seeks to redeem himself by protecting Naomi, a woman who has lost her faith. But when danger threatens — and his passion for her swells — will he choose his cherished home or his heart?

The Emerald Talisman by Brenda Pandos - Julia Parker would trade her ability to feel others emotions in a heartbeat, especially half the boys in school. When a vampire hunter rescues her before she's devoured by a bloodthirsty stalker, Julia discovers no one is safe. Unsure how to help, she seeks the advice of a psychic, only to find out she alone is the key to stopping the madness, problem is it'll require her rescuer's life.

Static by Tawny Stokes - Salem, a teenage groupie for the punk band Malice, gets more than she bargained for after a night of partying with the band--a headache, a stomachache and a sickness that's turning her into something inhuman. Only Trevor, the roadie, can help her navigate her new world of danger, darkness, and love.

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