My Naughty Thoughts : So Much Sex

Wow! Can a book have too much sex? Yes...um...No...hum...Is there even such a thing as too much sex? In my post Is it the Sex or the Story I said that I didn't read romance novels for the sex (scout's honour). Well, I just stepped out of that zone. I admitted in my last post Fifty Shades of WTF that I finally read a romance novel purely for the sex. My curiosity got the better of me. I'd heard the hype surrounding Fifty Shades of Grey, my cousin was reading it (and she never reads) so I thought, what the hell.

Boy was I blown away, and that I think is an understatement. I've never read an erotica before, my romance genre being historical, regency and paranormal, so I really have nothing to compare my experience to. Do all eroticas have this much sex? It wasn't graphic in the least, thankfully, but every other page had a sex scene. Anastasia and Christian did it every day, sometimes four times a day, every which way. Who has the time for all that? I was tired just reading about it, didn't they get tired doing it? Jeez.... I mean

Those two did it here and there, those two did it everywhere.
Yes they did it on a bar, they even did it in a car.
They didn't do it on a train, but they did it on a plane.
They went out sailing on The Grace, and on the sea they did embrace.
You'd think by now their ardour would douse, but alas, they did it in his parent's boathouse. 

The elevator ride, need I say more, definitely deserves another, encore.
He has no pool up in his tower, so they steamed up his grand shower.
On the bed, the wall, the door, they even did it on the floor.
He really really tried his best, and got her flat on his desk.

You want to know where else you say, they did it in his room of play.
There he tied her up with cable, and they did it on a table.
Speaking of being tied up, he used leather, rope, chains and cuffs.
Lordy lord the things they've done, would make an innocent maiden run.
For she lets him do real naughty things, why not when she got the ring.

Do I now feel like I've OD'ed on sex (the reading part - wink)? Hum...honestly, I got bored reading it. It was a little too much for me. The rest of the story was great. I enjoyed the emotional ups and downs. But OMG enough already....so I guess for me...a book can have too much sex.

And that's my naughty thoughts on sex, sex, and more sex in romance novels.

Later Loveys

P.S. Don't forget to share/google+ this post if you liked it

My Naughty Thoughts : Fifty Shades of WTF

A few days ago I locked myself out of my apartment and of course as luck would have it, that day my landlords were out and my cell was dead. For two and a half hours I sat outside my door on the cold, hard concrete and waited for my landlords to return and relieve me from my self inflicted hell. Let me just say that days later my ass still hurts.

Anyway, though I'm in the habit of carrying my tablet, I am not in the habit of leaving my WiFi on. So there I was, stuck outside with no cell phone and no internet to pass the time. Then I remembered, I have one book on my tablet that I haven't read yet. It's been there for weeks and I've been debating whether or not I really want to read it.

So now I had two choices, I could stare at the slowly darkening sky, or I could read the book. (Oh I don't socialize with my neighbours). So I fired up my tablet and opened my reader and a grey cover with a silk tie flashes across my screen. The title Fifty Shades of Grey captures my attention and I dive in.

Yes its been a few years since the book came out and I'm only now reading it. (I didn't start reading the Twilight series til after I watched the first movie). Let me be honest, I'm reading it for the sex. Pure and simple, no other reason. I've wondered for a while what all the hoopla was about. I actually thought it would be a little more graphic, or maybe I just haven't gotten there yet. I am only on chapter twenty-four. But I must say, I can't remember the last time I read a book with so much sex.

The weirdest thing I find about reading this book is how it uncovered a part of me that I didn't know existed. I am an extremely dominating person, type A personality. Christian ain't got nothing on me. Everything is always my way or no way. And I'm quick to anger when I don't get my way. I couldn't be submissive even if you paid me. Yet I find myself gravitating more towards the Anastasia role. I'm a little like her where I tend to over-think everything and it gets so tiring sometimes, my mind always running. Thinking about outcomes and perception. The idea of simplifying something in my life by giving over control to someone else has some appeal.

So I said I started this book for the sex, and now I've shifted gears.  I've become wrapped up in Christian's psychological problems. Now all I want to know is why doesn't he like to be touched? What's his hang up about food? And did his birth mother or Mrs Robinson make him "crazy"? I love a male lead with problems. It always gives him so much more depth than a Mr. Perfect. The Christian character has got me more hooked than the sex.

I've already cheated and read pages from book three because I had to know if Christian and Anastasia make it to the end. I'm exerting massive amounts of control not to read the last few pages of book one. I'm dying to know what happens already. (That's a nasty habit of mine, reading the end of books before I even start it).

Anyway, so on I read, 50 pages left.

And that's my naughty thoughts on fifty shades.

Later Loveys

P.S. Don't forget to share/google+ this post if you liked it

My Naughty Thoughts : Five Minutes to Sex

Recently I read a romance novel where after knowing (or barely knowing) each other for all of five minutes the hero and heroine were already knocking boots. I guess the prudish part of me kicked in because I was like, what the....(I always have that reaction actually). It made me think about my friend who's already doing the nasty with her boyfriend of five months and how it took my ex an entire year to get any from me.

Am I being the last prude standing when I do a double take when I read about heroines who sleep with the hero five minutes after meeting him. And am I being the one thing I hate more than a liar, a hypocrite, if my writing reflects such a state. I won't even kiss on a first date, but the female characters I have dancing in my head wouldn't hesitate to go after something or someone they wanted, and that includes sexually. I, on the other hand, am nothing like that.

When I write from a character's perspective I tend to infuse a lot of myself into them. All my characters have a piece of my personality in them, except in this aspect. Maybe deep down I wouldn't mind for once throwing caution and upbringing to the wind and indulging in the fantasy of succumbing to a sexual attraction with a hot stranger.

I've never really thought any less of a heroine who sleeps with the hero "on their first date" but I admit to feeling differently in real life. Is that a double standard? Or is it that I already know the heroine ends up with the hero, while real life isn't always that easy.

What do you think of the heroine who sleep with the hero within a day of knowing him? Is the idea a little bit of a turn on or are authors portraying women in a bad light?

And that's my naughty thoughts on giving it up in the first chapter.

Later Loveys

P.S. Don't forget to share/google+ this post if you liked it.

My Naughty Thoughts : Sex Outside the Romance Novel

In my last post I posed the question as to whether or not we read romance novels for the sex or the story. Myself, I enjoy a good story. I find fulfillment whether or not the romance has sex, as long as I can connect with the characters and their story. But I would be lying if I didn't admit that the sex has left a mark on me.  It altered my perception of reality and what I should really have expected, outside the romance novel.

I was a naive, impressionable, virginal teenager when I began my foray into the romance genre. I kissed my first boy at the age of twelve and hadn't had my first sexual experience until I was eighteen. Somewhere in-between those years, after reading countless romance novels, I had given myself a false expectation of sex. Lesson learnt; virgins with over active imaginations shouldn't read romance novels.

What was I to think? with my innocent self. None of the heroines I have read about ever complained about the sex. Bad sex doesn't exist in romance land. Even when the hero was a virgin he magically seemed to know what to do to take the heroine to the heights of ecstasy. So forgive my naiveté for believing that sex was always good. No, not good, Tony the Tiger, grrrrrreat. 

I can't say I was disappointed when I finally took my nose out of the books. Just a little disillusioned. I thought after so much studying I would have been an A+ student. I thought my sex life would be like a romance novel, intense, fiery and a little dirty, but instead I found myself stiff and self-conscious.  It was a rocky road for me getting comfortable in my own skin. How do you go from being a virgin on one page to a freak in the sheets on another? After more than a decade I'm still not there yet.

Although I've never had bad sex, I've never had sex on the level of a really good romance novel either. Now am I talking about the physical bed play or the emotional connection that make for great sex. Does either even exist?

And am I setting up any future partner I'm with to fall short of my overly romanticized expectations? If he's not a strong, powerful man who's a force of nature in bed will he not measure up in my mind? Am I going to have something good, but still want for just a little bit more?

One more thing, have you ever noticed how in every novel fifteen minutes after they're done, the lovers are at it again. Is that even possible?

And that's my naughty thoughts on sex outside the romance novels.

Later Loveys

P.S. Don't forget to share this post if you liked it.

My Naughty Thoughts : Is it the Sex or the Story

When I first started reading romance novels in my teens I became one of those people. You know… the type who hides the cover of their book when reading in public. Now almost twenty years later, when I read paperbacks, I still find myself lowering my book to my lap. When half naked hunky men or a couple writhing in passion grace the glossy cover of a book, it’s pretty obvious what you’re reading. Thank God for tablets.

It’s not that I'm ashamed to be caught reading such “trash”, I'm just tired of explaining to my friends that I'm not reading it for the sex, I really am reading it for the story. Then I get the ‘uh-huh’ look and I roll my eyes in my head because I know they've never even read a romance novel yet they’re judging. Those of us who like to indulge in this guilty little pleasure of ours know that there are some romance novels that don’t even have one line of sex. Romance doesn't always equal sex. It’s about the journey the characters are on. The obstacles they face, challenges they overcome and finally finding their happily ever after. Personally, I love reading about a powerful man whose heart is conquered by a willowy flower of a woman. I truly do skim the sex scenes and enjoy the banter between the hero and heroine. I like rooting for them to succeed, groaning in frustration at their near misses and being angered by a really good villain. I also like men on horses, ladies in long flowing gowns, and medieval castles. I do so love a good historical that can take me back in time. So poo....I like to read romance novels.

And now I've added the paranormal romance genre to my reading list. Oye...now I get two kinds of looks. The ‘uh-huh’ for reading a romance novel and the ‘what the hell’ for reading something about vampires and werewolves. I have to admit that I use to give my cousin the ‘what the hell’ look. Guilty. I didn't know any better. So why do I now read about witches and fairies? Because it's fun. They do humanly impossible things and live in this extra ordinary world where anything can happen. And the secret truth is...they're so damn sexy. Their stories always seem a little more intense, a little more dangerous. I love the darkness that seem to cloak the paranormal genre that's lighten by the romance between the main characters.

So yeah, romance novels have some sex. And maybe it is mommy porn for some of us. But its the story that really gets me going. A romance novel can have all the hot steamy sex scenes it wants, if the story's not there it falls flat for me. If the journey fizzles, I won't be reading book two. If I can't connect to the characters, then I've wasted my time. So I don't really care if there's sex or not, I just want a good story. Because a well crafted story stretches my imagination. For me when I read, it's like there's a little movie projector in my head and I'm seeing the story play out on a screen right in front of me. 

And that's my naughty thoughts about sex and romance novels.

Later Loveys